I took my weeding ring off today,he is very hard and cruel to me he does not understand my hurts and pain in this marriage.We went out last night and we had a good time, but the long over due of us separating has finally come to an end.He is living in his own apartment now since he got his job and it pays him so well he can now afford his own apartment, and I am happy for him.But his high demands from me is a little to much for me since, I have so much going on for me at home, with my kids and my work.I work from home and make my living from home so I can't live with him and that Is creating problems between us.Since I' m not there with him at nights he turns to porn, he smokes substances,he cheated on me once,I caught a woman in his apartment ,but I gave him a second chance, he is out of control.He wants to control me me tell me how to live my life constantly.I was trapped in a very high sexual,manipulative,controlling,impulsive,relationship.He USED ME for his convenience, and I am very hurt and angry at the same time.I bought a car that had a big problem, and I met him when I bought my car,he fixed it for me, that is one of the many professions he has and I became very fond of his Intelligence, I dated him ,then we got married.
A while now my car has a big problem and it's down presently,and my husband said he would help fix it LABOR WISE.Today we got in a big fight and he told me pick up my car he is not fixing it for me again.I have no problem with that,there are so many mechanics around and he is not the only one but,I realized something today, and maybe it's my fault I let him take advantage of me because all I ever did wrong was loved him too much.He used me alot for his own convenience, and love is blind and I did not see it coming at all.He had nothing when I first met him and I thought he was genuine so I took him in my home and began our long journey in what was supposedly be, love and commitment together.No I was wrong ,he had no place to stay and no car to drive and I was his target.Now don't get me wrong,I do think that he did love me just a bit considering the terrible things we've been through thus far,but he contributed to ALL! His ADHD is severe and I have ADHD mild, but having two ADHD married with loads of problems just won't cut it.There will be separation sooner or later,and I say this with having being in one myself.
Now the day has come that he has his car that he bought recently,and now his own place that he rents,he no longer needs me.I am in his tracks for living his free life of women and porn.I am very hurt and sad now and I write this with tears in my eyes and all I want is to get back my happiness somehow.I don't know how long it would take me to get him over because we had so many bad times together and alot of good memories also.This one is going to be very tough for me because I did not use him conveniently,he did.I was so real in our marriage and loved the good,bad and the ugly in him and stick with it.He did so many wrong things to me carried a next woman home by him on my birthday,took all our money out and transfer it to a different account,bad talked me in his work with co-workers,confided in female co-workers,complained on my kids nonstop,back answered my mother,eat with the ADHD disorder of chronic boredom, and never gave me money for groceries,insulted me in public,cheated,reap roach me,abused me,lied,cursed me,look at other women in my presence,control me,stopped me from having or talking to my friends,and lots lots more.He is very bad to me in so many different levels and I am not going to continue this marriage no more.I am going to continue to work hard as I usually do,work on regaining back some of my friends,take care of my kids,and to hell away with the abusive husband..IT'S OVER! I will get my car fix elsewhere and save my money for it...........from:lovehurtsalotwithanger