I've really struggled with trying to communicate my feelings to my wife. We are so different, she really doesn't want to hear them.  I've definitely found out what doesn't work with her.

It really doesn't matter if you have add or not; no one wants to be continuously badgered about their ineptness. So as many of you know I've worked very hard at acceptance of her realities. It really has helped me to get my focus back onto my self, and my responsibilities vs having my mind bombarded with what she is or isn't doing

Today was an interjecting day; I spoke into her life on three occasion's, she didn't like it based on her comments, but; I've learned to say it at the right time, and with the right tone and just say it once.  Also it's 100 times more effective if were at peace with each other....

She is bad to not take her adderall when she is off, and when does this, it's hard to communicate with her, she gets nothing done and the blurting out or I call it barking in disrespectful tones becomes worse...Yesterday she didn't take her adderall,  this morning she had her alarm set which woke me up and of course she lets it chime and chime and finally hits snooze, she can do that for hours...So as I was being woke up I said to her half a sleep it that was her phone vibrating, and she barked at me and said NO ITS MY ALARM!...I thought a second and said; "I'm sick of your barking; make sure you take your meds today. Then I nicely said: I don't think you hear yourself....She got up later much nicer; and it seemed obvious she had taken her adderall.

So after lunch she tells me our newly married Son was coming home with his new bride tonight so from 2 until 7 she was a cleaning and straiten machine...I was up busy also, I cooked dinner for all of us, vacuumed, done some dusting etc...So as we were about to set down to eat I just looked at her and said; This is the way I think we should live all the time, this is who your husband is...You shouldn't wait until someone you want to impress is coming to clean and pick up the house...(we still have piles but I just wanted to let her know that there is really no excuse for laziness and not doing some general cleaning a little along....She said WELL YOU AIN'T ME.. ha ha...I hit a nerve...but, she got my message and called me about 10 and told me she appreciated what all I did to help her...

.Then I suggested that for 3 months we try something....For the next 3 months I'm to not ask her for anything, and she is not to ask me for anything....I told her what ever we do for each other, how ever we show our love and commitment will be all their is...No asking....Of course she had a problem with it at first....But, to my amazement after about 2 minutes she said; " It might be a good idea"...Ha ha...Now I would faint dead away if she doesn't want something before lunch tomorrow....You talking about Therapy...3 months without asking me for anything would be strong medicine:)