I read through this forum when I was engaged (note previous tense) to a man with ADHD. I noticed that many people posting on this forum were considering leaving their spouse. I was considering the same. As with most relationships, we had our adventurous moments (probably because of the ADHD) and terrible moments where angry outbursts were more hurtful than I could have ever imagined. Letting go of a relationship soured by ADHD was the best decision that I have ever made (and will never regret). I could relate to nearly every post on this forum. It also provided me with foreshadowing of a marriage that I would never want to endure. Our relationship was out of balance. I was a "mother" to my significant other (not an equal) and rarely received the support that one should come to expect in an adult relationship. I hoped for kindness and love. Not kindness and love strewn with hateful words.
I asked myself one question: Would I treat someone who I love in the same way that my significant other is treating me? Absolutely not.
If I can provide a single person who is reading this forum with the courage to leave their relationship, then I have saved a life. Yes, it will be painful. Yes, it will be challenging. Yes, it will get better. Yes, you will finally be free.
I am so thankful for this forum because it provided me with insight into the progression of relationships in the setting of ADHD.
I spent over three years (and a year being engaged) to with a man who has ADHD. Letting him go was the best decision of my life.