My husband is inert. I feel like I'm married to a potted plant. When he comes home, he's "tired." He used to like to cook, now it's "I'm too tired, will you cook dinner?", which of course, I don't mind since I'm not working. Then we curl up in bed to watch TV (bedroom is the only room we can afford to heat), I knit or cross-stitch and he falls asleep. He says there's nothing wrong but it's driving me nuts. I thought they were supposed to by HYPERactive, not HYPOactive! Does anyone have any ideas?
I thought people with ADHD were supposed to be hyperactive!
Submitted by Sueann on 02/08/2011.
What is he like on the
Submitted by SherriW13 on
What is he like on the weekends? Is he working full time?
My husband is typically drained by the time he gets off of work AND it is the same time his meds are wearing down so he's pretty much 'done' for the day by the time 6 p.m. rolls around. I remember someone explaining how mentally exhausting it is to live with an ADHD mind...I just assume he is just experiencing this and needs the 'crash'.
He isn't like this on the weekends, he will get out and do stuff sometimes, but I do think the meds (yes, the stimulant meds) have made him less active, oddly. I like staying home too, I'm somewhat a homebody. He used to be a 'go go go!' type person, always looking for the next thing to do, acting like if he was at home just relaxing that he would just die..so it is nice to have some balance.
Even with ADHD, you don't often see hyperactivity in adults. It seems the "H" part of it for adults is lack of impulse control. In a child it would be them not sitting still in class...not controlling their urges to get up and run around, speak out of turn, etc. For adults it is more about spending money and not being able to see past the next 5 minutes.
I am sorry. Would he be open to suggestions if you wanted to get out of the house for a bit?
It's a little better on the weekends
Submitted by Sueann on
I can get him to do things then. What worries me is that he will continue like this when I go back to work. I honestly don't mind doing all the housework and cooking if I'm not working, but I know I'm going back to work in April if not sooner and I'm terrified of being still expected to do everything like I do now.
The other thing that worries me is that this is new. Until about 3 weeks ago, he wasn't acting like this. Now he's starting to have involuntary jerking motions (like on previous meds) and coming home like a zombie. He's not scheduled to see the doctor again until April.
Med Regulating
Submitted by ADD Husband on
I remember experiencing some of this when I was trying to figure out the right dose. I started on an ER Vyvanse that worked great from 8am-4pm but when it wore off I wasn't as much physically tired as I was mentally exhausted. I was having to fight the urge (and mostly lost) to not zone out. Once I would zone out I was then start to get sleepy and usually go to bed early and feel lethargic.
I liken it to running a marathon in your mind for 9 hours then when you are done you just are mentally done.
The problem I was having is the dose was great on Vyvanse it worked great when it was active in my system. It just wasn't lasting long enough throughout the day. I not only wanted the benefits during work but also in the evening's. I changed to a shorter acting Dexedrine ER (last 7 hours) that I can take twice a day. This was the solution; I could take one at 7:30am and it would last until just after noon and then another at 1pm and really it would last until 8 or 9pm. Now I will admit the first week was difficult because I wasn't able to sleep as sound. The reality is not all of the med was out of my system and thus getting to sleep was a problem. This went a way after the first week and as long as I stay on course and on time with the dose I am on point when it counts.
I also had a secondary problem with Low-T which was most of the energy problem. Once I got started on treatment for both my level of energy was great.
Impulsive
Submitted by kallimae on
Sueann-
Is he impulsive? My husband has adHd but it doesn't behave as if he is hyperactive, but he is VERY impulsive (pretty much proposed to me on impulse.... bought our car on impulse... lives on impulse). I've read that in adults the "h" can manifest itself that way. So perhaps he does have the 'h', it's just not displaying itself in standart ways?
His hyperactivity expresses itself in talking too much
Submitted by Sueann on
Not just to me-I talk a lot too and we are well matched that way. Great conversations.
But he talks too much at work (cause for at least one firing). My impression is that it caused him problems in school, but of course, I didn't know him then.
So maybe there is some hyperactivity. I could sure use some hyperactivity at home. Maybe he'd do SOMETHING!