Hi Funnyfarm,
Since we derailed the last forum topic, I thought I would copy your response here so I could respond in kind :). I think it's great that you are making your son reorganize daily. That has to be so much fun for you ;). I'm honestly quite impressed, and can say while parents attend meetings, communicate concerns, and the like, IT IS SO RARE to hear of a parent who helps their child with the critical skill of organizing, and does it so consistently and diligently. Daily. Wow. AND you are MAKING HIM DO IT, despite how he loves it so, which is equally important. What great habits you are training him to have. I tip my hat to you!!!
Since you know what works for him, I would suggest a friendly e-mail to his son's teachers at the start of the school year. You could just say that although he has trouble being quiet during class, you and his former teachers have found this method to be the most effective way to stop his behavior in his tracks. Maybe mention that you wanted to be proactive to save everyone some grief. That will be appreciated and make it seem like helpful advice rather than a mandate. Even if they do forget and try it their own way, they might remember if they are having trouble with him...
You also solved the backpack issue in addition to the binder issue! We could use more parents like you!
Question: Does your son have an IEP or a 504 plan?
Thank You for your comments, was a lot to take in. Some of it did apply to my son's situation some did not, not a class at the end of the day and his meds tend to last until about 5pm, both his and her story about the incident were the same...to a point, my son actually knows to tell the truth after many times of not giving me the whole picture and getting in trouble for 'lying', she left out the part when she belittled him. He was talking, she told him to stop, he continued and it escalated. I understand how frustrating it is when you tell a child to stop doing some behavior and they don't, it drives me nuts too, and I do agree he probably should have been told to go out in the hall, or received detention if he continued to talk, the name calling/belittling however is unacceptable, i expect that behavior from a child not an adult. That was the part I had a problem with. Some of his other teachers have told me they have a problem with him not being able to stop talking (he does have a hard time with putting the brakes on the mouth), but they have him step out in the hall they state their expectations and he stops, the act of being removed for 10 seconds works (works at home too), without having to yell at him or embarrass him. Since that wasn't the first time she called him names before sending him out of the class he argued back with her, as he said to me 'I have rights too'. I should have discussed this with her after the first time instead of waiting for it to become a bigger issue.
I did finally seem to figure out a way to help him with the organization/homework part. You were right the Binder WAS an issue, it seems so simple and it is what they are told to do but it doesn't work for him, as you said the amount of papers in each folder just got out of hand, to the point he couldn't close the binder. I gave my son a briefcase, put all his folders in it and he uses that instead of a binder and then having to put the binder in a back pack, some of his papers got lost in the backpack shoved at the bottom never to be seen again. Organizing papers weekly didn't work either, so I have him do that after he completes his homework every single day. He hates doing it, but it takes 10 seconds and he hasn't lost an assignment since. Hopefully now that we seem to have found something that works it wont be an issue next year.
thanks for your comments.
A Christmas Present Idea For My Son...
Submitted by Pbartender on
Interesting...
My autistic son has similar problems with the required school binder and keeping it tidy and organized. For him, the old papers never get cleaned out, until it's jam-packed and then new papers just get crammed in. The whole thing is a mass of crumpled paper that can barely close, and he can hardly find his assignments, because it's just a big mass of jumbled, mashed papers. He never has room in his backpack, and always ends up just carrying the binder anyway.
Perhaps I'll talk to his teachers and see if he can use a briefcase.
Pb.
Thank You so much for your
Submitted by funnyfarm on
Thank You so much for your comments. As you know its not easy being the mom of ADHD children. I tell you by the end of school I am ready for the break as much as they are. I did end the school year with a PPT meeting, letting the teachers know what worked and didn't work for him. I will have to start the school year off with a meeting also to get it off on the right foot before problems arise. Yes he has either a 504 or IEP..i can never keep them straight...he qualified for special ed svcs but he refuses alot of them because he doesn't want to appear different, so I try and do the stuff with him that he would have gotten help at school with.
As much as he hated cleaning out and organizing his papers every day he did get used to it, much easier daily than having a week or months worth of papers to go thru, and the overstuffed binder that was literally bursting at the seams...(he went thru 3 in the school year because they had broken) is a thing of the past. he could never even fit the binder into his backpack it was so full. My laptop briefcase worked so well for him I have bought one for my younger son to use next year also...same issue different child, dejavu all over again.