I am new to the site.  I was watching Dr. Phil last week and it was on ADHD and marriage.  I sat my husband down when he got home and had him watch it.  When the guy was cooking the meal for his wife and he made the comment about the water taking forever to boil... my hub does it every single time he cooks.  Even he agreed that the underline problems were us.  I always say he is in his own world.  When you have an infant it tests your marriage every day.  But with him being so selfish it is taking a toll on us as a family.  It is effecting my daughter now, he doesn't make time for her and she is not really bonding with him, he is more like an uncle.  He is a great guy, works hard at his job and is a good provider, he is a great friend and so fun to hang out with, but a husband and a dad.... not so much.  He spends money like it grows on trees, he is always making plans to go do something, he doesn't help out around the house... never cooks (except for bbqs).  I was laid off in Sept last year and am home with our child.  I was bored so I am watching an infant for extra money.  I feel like I am doing everything I can to push us forward, but he keeps holding us back.  My biggest thing is when we go places I am trying to work with him on helping out more and he is trying soooooo hard but it isn't working, he gets distracted so easy and just leaves me and the baby to do everything.  I need to know if medication is going to help or if I am going to have to learn to deal with having him as another child forever. ...  oh yes another reason I am reaching out for help is I have always wanted 4 kids and now with just one we are overwhelmed and I don't want to not have my big family because he didn't get help.

-nicol