Hi Everybody (or whoever reads this!) My wife & I (bless her) have been married 47 years in Oct09. Now that's some distance you'll have to agree! For some time now, my long-suffering wife has contended that I suffer from ADHD and that I need to receive some sort of treatment. Now, I'm not averse to treatment ... in fact I may love it! But AM I REALLY suffering ADHD, or am I suffering from the trauma of being over 65 years of age (or at the time her comments started ... was I suffering the trauma of being over 45 years of age?)
My wife was watching the Dr Phil Show and she saw the various interviews and expert opinions on ADHD sufferers and the marriage mates. In turn she mentioned them to me, and said 'there's help out there. All you have to do is visit the medico for referral to a specialist' Hence, these few comments I've penned. I wouldn't have the faintest idea that I have ADHD, but if I have, I would absolutely seek treatment to make life easier for the woman who's blessed my life.
Sure, early in our marriage, I always had difficulty paying the bills. Not that I didn't have the money, but, what the h**l, they can wait for the money, can't they? Well after receiving the initial contact of recovery action by the home lender and other creditors, my wife was forced to take over the bill paying. I don't have a credit card, because I'm untrustworthy around money (that is, tend to spend it!) My hardworking wife has been paying the bills ever since. BUT ... I gave up smoking because it was taking food out the mouths of my children and preventing me from putting clothes on their backs! So there were some standards, eh?
I still work full-time at a job I don't like and in which I find no joy. But as one our politicians so succintly stated, 'Life wasn't meant to be easy!' Very nice. So I get up early, go to work, put in 10hrs, come home, eat a meal, listen to the 'daily bulletin' from my spouse, work on the computer doing some research, my wife watches TV (mostly reality shows which I can't stand! But she does and that's important to me.) Then she 'toddles off' to bed. I have trouble sleeping, so go to bed at a later hour. We don't sleep in the same room as the snoring is quite disruptive. We haven't slept in the same room on a regular basis for at least 8 years or so.
But my habits apparently drive my wife crazy. What are they? Well when we're leaving the house in the car, and we're about 200m down the road, I suddenly remember that I've left something important at home and have to go back to collect it. This happens regularly and it's driving my poor wife to distraction. There's also the fact that I contradict her or interrupt her, when she's talking. What's wrong with inserting a correction or an 'accuracy' into whatever she's stating. She contends that I can't stand it when she talks but that it's part of my 'problem.'
My wife has been a fantastic partner all the time we've been together. She has extremely high standards of behaviour and social skills. And expects me to take on those same standards. It's all part of the moulding process I suppose. She doesn't keep account of the injury when we heatedly discuss matters (in fact neither of us do). Once we've both explosively said our piece, we move on. Life's too short, isn't it? Our marvellous children are a product of her mothering and nurturing and they too have high standards. We are both very, very proud of them. Our children came along when we were both very young - she was 18 years old and I was 20! So yes! 'Survival' is indeed our middle name!
But at work I'm known as a bit of a joker and a loose cannon, but I DO NOT give my supervisors any angst. In fact I'm known as the reliable one, the one who doesn't mind taking on that little bit extra. I've been employed here for 20 years and have become something of a fixture.
I'm sure there are a lot of other things I do which irritates my wife and which have her declaring to our children and closest of friends that I am probably suffering from ADHD.
Nothing makes me really, really angry except crimes against women, crimes against children and crimes against the elderly! Oh yes! And when my wife contradicts me publicly or (in my opinion, right or wrong) puts me down publicly. But anyone would suffer that angst, wouldn't they?
So please help out here. Am I suffering from ADHD? Do I need to be taking medication.
Thank you for reading this far and i would appreciate your comments and suggestions
Dan