My husband denies his ADD. He did very well on Adderall but quit taking it because he didn’t like to go to the doctor for refills. When I try to talk to him about anything at all, he gets angry. If I ask any question, he perceives it as an accusation. We have been married 32 years. I told him the night we met that I did not date men who smoked. He lied and said he did not. I told him I would not marry him if he didn’t quit, he did for only a short time. I would ask every birthday and Christmas if he would quit. He would say that he would if… I would fulfill my part but he still did not. The worst part was after he had cheated on me and moved to another state. He told me that he would quit smoking if I moved to that state with him. The last straw was when he told our church group that he couldn’t stop when I asked (right after I found porn on his computer) but that God had given him a date that, if he waited and stopped on that day, God would enable him to stop smoking for good. He sees his smoking when I’m not around as just fine. I’ve explained that the smoke stays in his lungs (I’m allergic) plus it’s a breach of promise once again. He only gets mad and says he’s done nothing wrong—but he doesn’t want any of our church friends to know. He knows he has betrayed my trust in many things and continues to lie and has no compassion for how he hurts me. Is his complete denial of any wrongdoing a typical symptom of someone with ADD? If other people agreed that constantly lying and breaking promises is indeed not right, might he believe it?  My daughter wants me to leave this man that shows no remorse for any pain that he causes anyone. I’m trying to determine if he will ever be able to recognize that his choice to continue breaking promises and lie are hurting his marriage. Thank you for any opinions.