My husband was diagnosed 9 years ago and it has been a battle, both for him and our family.
HIs medications have changed a few times over the years, i don't have specifics on the treatment, all he asked me was to let him know if significant changes in his behavior happened. They have over the last 2-3 years: anger, impulsivity, negative mindset that makes him feel attacked even though there is nothing of the sort. I have mentioned it a few times but nothing changed.
In the last year and a half, he was diagnosed with depression and I know they increased one of his meds. Not only has the past behavior gotten worse, now he has significant memory issues, forgetting entire conversations (did not used to be like that) and even people's names.
I have been patient and supportive (even though he says he can't see that) but I am at the end of my rope.I want a divorce. I told him that but our daughter would have to give up on a lot - we are in a very expensive city, she has ADHD too and needs to continue therapy, she is in a great school in a specialized program and she is an athlete. A divorce would be very detrimental to her.
So I am looking for solutions.
I keep thinking his treatment plan is not working and I seriously think his meds are an issue. Can they be too high? He works odd hours so he takes meds morning and evenings, not sure which one when. Wellbutrin XL 300mg Vyvanse 10MG and 60MG
Meds
Submitted by Stef G on
I would suggest your husband see a psychopharmacologist. This individual is aware of the nuances of meds and how multiple meds work or don't work together and would be able to evaluate all of your husband's meds, not just the ones for ADHD. My husband sees one 4 times per year and when she writes an rx always starts with the minimum dosage and increases the dosage incrementally until both she and my husband believe the correct dosage has been achieved. Obviously, this can be time consuming, but is well worth the money you spend.
Thanks
Submitted by Julia on
never heard of that. Will have him look into it.
i don’t mind the time. I wish he realized how bad things are so he would decide to do something.
My husband took 20 mg (small
Submitted by Hopeful Heart on
My husband took 20 mg (small dose) of Adderall for six months. The Adderall made his hyperfocus even more intense. He became even more detached and more distant than usual. He became more forgetful. His personality also starting changing. He accused me of things that I didn’t do and would become irrational. This behavior was out of character for him. It almost completely ended our marriage.
The strangest part is that my husband had no idea that things were getting worse. From his point of view, he was focusing better and getting more done. Finally, he agreed to stop taking the Adderall. It took some time being off the meds before he was back to normal.
It was a really difficult situation because my husband wanted to communicate with the doctor by himself, but he wasn’t able to accurately communicate to the doctor what was happening.
It sounds very similar to your situation.
Sounds a lot like us
Submitted by Julia on
i have been astounded at certain behaviours. He accuses me of things untrue all the time, also says I am attacking him when I am not, like he’s a bit paranoid, certainly very negative. Says there is no issue at all with his behaviour, blames me for making things up. I have have been telling him for a long time to talk to his doctor and therapist but he hasn’t. Says there is nothing to discus.
I really think it’s the meds. We have been together for 18 years. I know him and this isn’t him.
I can’t do this anymore, I cry every day.
i need to convince him to go talk to his doctor or therapist together.
Not communicating to the doctor
Submitted by dedelight4 on
I think the non communicating to the doctors is a big issue for ADHD people. Since they can't adequately express what is happening with them, how can the doctors ever know without talking to the spouses? How many spouses have been asked to sit in during a doctor visit, or separately? Not very many, I suppose.
H doesn't say anything when he goes to the doctor. I've been with him for other things, and his communication about whatever issue is very poor. H even told the last doctor he saw (when H broke his leg) that he had a problem with pain killers in the past. This wasn't even true in the least bit. And, when it came time for surgery the doctor wouldn't give H adequate pain control because of what he said about his past "problem". I was flabbergasted at the whole thing. When, I asked H why he said what he did, he couldn't tell me a clear defined reason. But, he was trying to tell the doctor he had trouble with meds in the past but it WASNT pain killers. But, the way he described it, made it seem like he had an addiction problem before......and he NEVER has.....to any medications. It was really bizarre. H again, wasn't " in the moment" when talking to the doctor. He was somewhere else. He has admitted this lately, (about thinking too many things at once) and misses what's going on or what he's doing in the moment. Scary.
Meeting with spouse's doc
Submitted by Stef G on
I have attended several of my husband's appointments with his psychopharmacologist, because she wants to know how his meds impact me.
I think family doctors do not understand adult ADHD and do not know how to prescribe meds for this condition. Because this specialty deals exclusively with drugs, I think this is the only way to go when dealing with adult ADHD.
We live in eastern TN and could give you a referral by email.
Stef, that sounds awesome
Submitted by dedelight4 on
We live in Georgia, not too far from Atlanta.A referral would be great. TN isn't too far from here. A psychopharmacologist sounds like a wonderful way to go. I've looked for ADHD help in this area, and there isn't a whole lot here, and some have closed down. There are children's ADHD places, but not many for adults. Maybe I haven't looked in the right places.
I can't even imagine a doctor asking ME how this affects us. So far it hasn't happened. It would be amazing to have that happen.
Misread email option
Submitted by Stef G on
I think I misread the send email option, which is just to send a post by email (instead of printing the post) and not to send a private email like you can do on ancestry. So I am not able to contact you.
Doing some research here in Canada
Submitted by Julia on
Thankfully we are in a major centre so there are a lot of resources.