So I've always figured I am a Non. My spuse is recently DX and my son is showing signs of ADHD but different from the spouse. My background is that I was raised by a single mother who DEFINITELY has it but with her age, generation, etc has never been diagnosed. I kinda figured that it skipped me because I am quite organised, high functioning and tons of executive functioning. I also played sports to a very high level through most of my life.
But it was suggested to me recently to consider getting myself tested because there are certain traits that I've shown through therapy and other interactions that point to me having ADHD but it doesn't affect me as much as I see, for example, it does my husband. I've taken on more of the Non traits bc - as I put it - I just get s**t done.
Just wondering if anyone here has had the same? Or perhaps they did get tested and it wasn't the case of ADHD? I'd love to hear your experience and if you did get tested and your household became a dual-ADHD household, how did you manage that?!?!?!?!
particularly in women I've heard this is common
Submitted by alphabetdave on
essentially women sometimes seem to be better at masking ADHD - usually at high cost to themselves, as masking is always at a cost
from what I gather, they pretty much learn to put in place lots of coping mechanisms (not necessarily all good?) so that they get through life fairly minimally affected by ADHD on the outside
menopause in particular seems to be a lot of women's "breaking point", all the changes involved throw them out of whack, their masks don't work nor do their strategies
I'll not make this a long comment because clearly I'm not talking about my own experience here and only half know what I'm on about lol, but it's a thing - definitely worth a google for better info
edit:
Worth pointing out though, that even if true, you can't "become a dual ADHD household" - if true, you already are one, and always have been. ADHD can just present very differently in different people, and in particular society/medicine is only just coming to terms with the fact that ADHD in women isn't any less common than it is in men. Historically girls/women have been much less likely to be diagnosed (despite the fact that there have always been cases where girls have been diagnosed - it's not that it never happened, more that it's much more likely to have been ignored instead). Also I think a lot of ADHD behaviours are more extreme versions of what we as a society have decided is "typical boy/man behaviour" and as such women are much more likely to be conditioned to suppress those behaviours growing up and "act more like a girl", whereas boys will be told "boys will be boys" instead.
Again though, masking/suppressing these behaviours is pretty much always at huge cost to your own mental well being so these women have been done a massive dis-service here, which tbh is probably nothing new to women at this point
ADHD
Submitted by c ur self on
I think my brother's both had it....Of course ADHD is a sliding scale diease....I'm about like you...My daughter got tested years ago, she has mild to moderate....My spouse has it at a clinical level...(adderall)....My daughter has many of my characteristics....I'm not effected in most of the way's my wife is, plus she has personality disorders, and is possibly on the spectrum....My biggest issues are detailed talking, and interrupting....I've always been extremely high functioning....Work meetings just drug for me....And I was prone to interrupt on occasion....Same with my wife, if she starts out a conversation w/ a negative comment (blaming) my tendencies were always to cut her off w/ interruptions....I don't accept blaming when ownership must be had for the conversation to have value....But, I'm like you I get a lot done....I would guess if tested, I would be mild to moderate also....
c