I decided yesterday I was taking back my life after four years of marriage.

I can't trust my husband. Most times when I ask him to do something he will not respond, he'll just wait a while and get up and do it. If I remind him, he gets annoyed. He feels useless and hopeless because I can't trust him, because...I can't. He'll do things in his time, which is like a week or sometimes months after I needed them done. He just failed out of school, has no job because I finally drew the line on working and school (he failed last semester while working so I hoped this would get him through). I work 60+ hours a week in a high powered job and am currently doing at least half the chores, all the pet care, and of course bringing in all income. Love-wise, I feel love but of course, I don't feel trust anymore. Sex is non-existent for more complicated reasons, but also....trust. Money is tight, as probably 1/3 of my income goes to keeping him. He sits on his computer and plays online all day. He feels useless and I feel done.

I've always been in poor health and assumed I couldn't do it all (keep up with life, work, and social life) with my health. I was looking forward to his graduating so I could finally drop down to half time on work and focus on making the household run while still bringing in some money. That's no longer an option. However, I can't continually live life waiting for my husband to finally, finally do the things I need him to do so I can do what I need to do. I'm taking back my life and will just do it all. At that point, it may be that my life is better without him, and I choose to leave. I'm terrified of that option, but it's a reality. Part of the reason he's worth putting up with is because of how supportive he is. But. I'm. Done. At this point, the health risks of doing it all are better than the uncertainty of day, to day, to day. 

Supposedly he's making an appointment to see if he qualifies for ADHD meds tomorrow....I'll let you know if that gets done in the next month.