Just a quick post about failure. I just read this under marriage tips in this forum ...
“Epic failure is part of being human, and it’s definitely part of being married. It’s part of what being alive means, occasionally screwing up in expensive ways. And that’s part of what marriage means, sometimes hating this other person but staying together because you promised you would. And then, days or weeks later, waking up and loving him again, loving him still.”
-Ada Calhoun, NY Times
For some unkown reason....while sitting in a reception room killing time before my turn to see my doctor many years ago....I was reading an article on George Harrison (Beattles) shorty after he died. I can't tell you much about the article or can even remember what magazine it was in...
What I do remeber quite well was something he said. I have to paraphrase him here since I can't find this article even after searhing for it again. The jist of what he said in a passing comment within the interview was this....Since he became so famous and quite wealthy at the early age of 19 years old...and even after his life previously had been full of struggles and normal everyday triumphs and failures....his biggest regret in life as he reflected on it shortly before he passed away in this interview was.....not having to struggle.....things came to him too easily and once that happened, he felt cheated in life by his success, fame and more money than he knew what to do with.
I thought about the money apect and this part didn't seem that diffiult to understand...but as he said it....it wasn't just the money. It was not having to work for things, strive for them, fail and struggle more to get things in life and feel that feeling you get when you've worked hard for something and then you finally get it after struggling long and hard to get there.
I realized when I read the quote about failure here....and thinking about George Harrisons comment again.....I realized what George Harrison was saying. I have the very thing that he regretted most about his life looking back. How very fortunate I am to know this feeling and know where it came from which is exatly the same thing the articel was trying to say:)
J
Nice thought J
Submitted by c ur self on
No one can take that prize from us either J. Nothing can replace the growth we experience from our perseverance. Every life is unique, we all have been born into a world where there will be challenges and trails.
The only real difference I see between people who have navigated a life of hard knocks for 40 or 50 or more years is this..."Thankfulness" which to me is one of the greatest signs of wisdom. People who are thankful usually learn and grow and find contentment, even through the fire of their struggles. The other group sadly become victims, somewhere on their Journey they lose hope, they lose site of their blessings and the ability to be thankful...
For c ur self, I never want to lose the spirit of Thankfulness....Because the real truth is other than being born...much of the hard places I've endured since I became a man was by my own choosing.
The good news is Jesus loves us and as we experience him our site will be restored, and our ability to be thankful will return:)
C
To blame is to stop growing.
Thank You C
Submitted by kellyj on
What you said brought something to mind that is really interesting. When you look at Maslow's hierarchy of needs pyramid.....the panicle or highest level you can achieve based on his model is self actualization.
At the highest level of the human experience which is referenced in this model as a "need" ......rather than a "want"....
Whether we ever get there or not...Self Actualization is: Mortality, Creativity, Spontaneity, Problem Solving, Lack of Prejudice and Acceptance of Facts ( accepting reality ).
I can't see any difference in what Jesus was teaching us and what this model suggests? Science only explains Gods work....it doesn't replace it:)
At the lowest rung in the model of the human experience..... which is defined as Psychological needs are: breathing, water, food, shelter, sex and excretion.
Next comes Safety, defined as:security of body, employment, tangible resources, resources of morality, family, health and property
The next rung up the ladder is Love and Belonging : friendship, family, sexual intimacy. Notice how sexual intimacy and sex are separated here in the model. Sex being at the bottom rung along with excretion! (thinking in terms of masturbation and porn here as well....not as a right and wrong thing...only pointing out where this belongs in the hierarchy itself? ) Sexual intimacy is two rungs up the ladder in needs at a much higher level.
They are different....you can have one without the other, but you can't reach this level without having both together at the same time. If this is true...you're right back to the bottom rung and lowest level along with food, water and shelter.
For guys especially .....I think this is a good thing to consider and being able to recognize which one is which? I can say for myself....I can have sex by myself or with another person and still not be intimate on this level. A good thing in being able to recognize the difference I think....even more so for someone with ADHD from the sound of so many posts of this forum that are complaining about this very thing.
The next and last level before you reach self actualization is Esteem: self esteem, confidence, respect of others and respect from others. I think it's pretty safe to say at this level....you can't have one without the other if you want to get to this level and stay there and before you get to advance to the next and highest level of self actualization.
If we ever want to achieve the highest level of self actualization and feel completely fulfilled and happy as being your own personal goal.....all the other levels and needs need to be satisfied one level at a time before you get to step up to the next and each consecutive level. If you are being a victim and waiting for this to happen without putting the effort in yourself....it never will. We have to give before we can get.....always!!
It might be safe to say.....that if we are being a "victim"....we "want" what we "need" but we are unwilling to put in the effort to get there and give up some things along the way in the process? Possibly?
And there ain't no short cuts either!!! lol That's a lot of success and failure right there if we ever want to make it to the top It's not about how long it takes....only that we get there:)
J