I left my husband of over 30 years more than five weeks ago, and the peace, calm, and freedom are intoxicating.  I miss the way he used to be long ago, but this separation only reinforces the idea that if we have any chance of making our marriage work there need to be some enormous changes.  I had asked him to seek treatment for ADHD/depression, and he did restart medication.  I take that as a positive, but the depression and inaction  that have kept him stuck and unemployed for the last 5 and a half years are truly scary, and no amount of Adderall will change that. I am so scared because now that I am away, I cannot imagine going back to the chaos, the anger, and the darkness. I said I needed a break, but he is already pressuring me to move back even though there have not been significant changes. He is in a terrible place since I left,, and my heart aches to see that. He told me in a derogatory way that this text can't  convey, "I get the feeling that you will be fine, whether we are together or not." Bingo....I just didn't realize that until I left. I hope and pray that he will find the strength to do the right things for himself, and that he will not live in anger and bitterness over my choice.