Hello! I'm new to this site and was wondering if I could get some help with a really irritating part of our relationship.
My partner is lovely but has NO spacial awareness and is constantly running into things, bashing himself against something, tripping, bruising himself, or me!! He tells me he's been clumsy his entire life (he has awful stories about getting seriously hurt) but I don't necessarily enjoy being bumped, bashed with an elbow, kicked accidentally, bent the wrong way, etc. He kinda reminds me of Lenny from Of Mice and Men (you know what I'm saying) where he seriously doesn't recognise his own strength. He is also very abrupt in his movements as well so there is never a smooth physical transition, always a shooting upward to stand up or jab of an arm to grab something so I never an able to anticipate his movements (currently I'm trying to type this with a sore wrist because I was cuddling him when he decided to suddenly flex his back into my wrist and pin my hand to the ground)
It's entirely accidental and he always feels bad for hurting me, but I'm just over it!! Any tips for improving spatial awareness? It would be nice to not have to hold his elbows when I walk behind him to protect myself in case he suddenly gives me a jab!
Thanks so much! Looking forward to hearing advice :)
just a thought
Submitted by barneyarff on
My brother in law discovered as a young adult that he was seeing 3 of everything and that wasn't normal. His whole childhood was trying to navigate three of everything.
When he was wrestling he said that he couldn't tell which pair of legs were the real ones so he opened his arms really wide and grabbed for all of them. Then they found out his unusual vision problem which was corrected. He was amazed! Don't know if that is what you are dealing with but since it is so unusual, I thought I would mention it.
There maybe things he can do to help....
Submitted by c ur self on
I'm not sure if there are professional's who are studied in this area, but, I think your partner should find out...My personal suggestion would be exercise....Physical and Physiological exercise....Things to help him w/ his balance and to find his center....
Does he do this type of stuff?? Dancing and learning to stand on his head at will for periods of time...And, other balance related poses....Believe it or not this is not uncommon for many add type people, who live in a tunnel vision type revved up minds,...My wife's body has been broken up over the years from this style of quick act living...People who tend to move without thought, instead of "thinking through things" can be very fast, and very good at somethings, but, also can be all over the place to (put themselves at risk)...Especially if they tend to have balance issues to begin with...
And some people are just tender,...I'm not saying you are....But there is a huge difference in pain tolerance between people....My late wife, was tender;), she didn't want her back rubbed w/ any pressure, she was sensitive to light, noise and other things....
My present wife, sleeps by listening to books on tape, noise seems to have no effect on her.....And when I give her a massage, she wants strong hands on her body....
So this is also something to consider....But, it's up to your partner to want to try some things....These things I suggested may not help his clumsiness, (and he may already be doing them) but, they will improve his balance, physical and emotional health...Which may go a long way in helping him gain awareness of his movements and be smoother at them....
I hope you can find ways to help with this issue...
C
Clumsy and\or breaking things
Submitted by dedelight4 on
Hi Pochi, glad you found this site. (Its great) My ADHD husband is also very clumsy, mainly because he has no body awareness at all. He is hyperactive and his body movements are fast\faster and faster still, jerky, and can sometimes cause hurts to others or me because his mind and actions are not together. (He shut my fingers in the car door twice) He also breaks al!most everything he touches because he's impatient in doing things and isn't careful. (Not a detail person AT ALL)
I had to teach him to appreciate small things around d him, even very beautiful things. Which was mainly getting him to FOCUS on his surroundings and stay in the moment. But mainly LOOK and BE AWARE of who and what is around you. He's better at it, but not a lot. This was one of the effects his bipolar mother had on him, I believe. She was the same way. (Very odd and very angry) I know his mother didn't understand why SHE was so different from the other wives and mothers she knew,but had no one to ask about it, so she just stayed angry and untreated and in denial.
Anyway, yes, my husband is majorly clumsy, and it's frustrating at times. I'm sorry that in your case it ends up hurting you physically. That's not good, and would be hard to live with daily. IMHO, I think he could use some treatment for this. There are exercise classes, like someone else mentioned that might help, (not gym stuff) maybe something like slow movements like tai chi or similar. But maybe you should ask your doctor. Is he being treated for his ADHD?