An Easy Trap new On January 23rd, 2008 MelissaOrlov said: It is not only non-ADD spouses, but also some doctors and some people with ADD who would pathologize ADD and make people believe they have something wrong. They have something...yes...just like people who can't see without glasses have something. It's hardwired into their brains. BUT, that something can be wonderful and fabulous, too. The issue is - how do you find the equivalent to glasses for your ADD relationship? The thing that makes it easier both for you and for those around you? Unfortunately, the state of learning about ADD means that there is still a stigma attached to ADD for many people. If you went around saying you thought your husband was abnormal because he needed glasses everyone would laugh at you. Not so with ADD - it's got that stigma... On the other hand, if you went around, needing glasses and running over people in your car all the time because you couldn't see them, but refused the "treatment" of glasses, people would be angry with you - just as spouses are often angry about ADD that is ignored or denied. The stigma has terrible consequences...that are so unnecessary! I look forward to the time when people see ADD for what it is - something that is a part of you, the negative symptoms of which can (but don't always) have terrible impact on others (and you) if not dealt with. And, here's the good news - there's a real upside to having ADD once you figure it out (unlike glasses...which simply bring your eyesight up to where everyone else is). Melissa Orlov