Hi, everybody! This is my second post here. The first one was a little over 3 months ago about how difficult it has been for me and my husband (ADHD), specially since the baby (1y6m) was born. Thank you so much for all the feedback and advice!!
Unfortunately, things have not improved since then. We've been seeing a couples therapist, but I don't know if it's helping that much. It's so draining all of this.
We've been fighting so much, even in front of the baby, which is the last thing that I wanted!! I don't want us to hate each other. When enough is enough? It's been almost a year, and it's only getting worse. We've been together for 20 years now, maybe we are afraid to face the truth... it's so, so sad all of this.
Everytime we fight, it's like we are living in 2 completely different universes. It's madness and it doesn't go anywhere. He says I started the fight, and I say he's the one who started the fight. I say he is being aggressive and impatient towards me and the baby, he says that I'm the one who's being aggressive and etc.
Our finances are a mess, and I've been asking for our banks infos and etc for almost a year, and he doesn't give it to me, so we might be in debt and I don't even know it! I can't live like this anymore. How can I find the straingth to leave? He is an amazing dad, a truly wonderful person, so it's hard...
Different universes
Submitted by Swedish coast on
I find your description of an ADHD universe and a non-ADHD one as very spot on. If you're like me, even decades spent with an ADHD partner don't give access to that other universe. To us, they just act crazy.
I will echo what someone else wrote: listen to your heart. There is no comfort for non-ADHD partners coming from that other universe.
Best of luck. I feel for you and your small child.