My husband was diagnosed four years ago with ADD/bipolar and depression. We live 3 hours from the nearest ADHD specialist. We're still trying to figure out the medications that are right for him. Still not finding a therapist nearby who is the right fit or really knows their stuff, which is probably the reason that the medication has still not been figured out in four years.
I want to move nearer to help and resources in order to keep our family afloat. My husband wants to on one hand, but the stress and fear of such a big change is trumping that desire and so he wants to stay here--he grew up here.
I'm desperate. I don't want to live like this forever. He's about to lose another job.
I think that the only way for us to stay afloat, to break out of this dark, helpless hole we're in, is to get real help.
I need someone to tell me whether I'm probably right and that I should insist that we move whether he likes it or not. HOW IMPORTANT IS THE RIGHT THERAPIST?
personal advice
Submitted by Geese on
Finding the Right Therapist
Submitted by kellyj on
is really important I think. I went through 3 before I found one that I could connect with. One I thought was horrible and gave me bad advise...one was just Okay but nothing was really coming from it...and one I liked but the times and the drive to get there was actually posing a problem in itself.
I think, for a person in crisis or is really struggling....the easier the better in doses that they can handle. If the disruption to your life makes the overwhelm greater than before....it counter acts the benefits since the benefits come over time. One on one therapy can take different forms and different approaches and each therapist seem to have their own unique way of approaching things. Trust and rapport are critical if it is going to work?
Moving does sound like a radical change with no guarantees to these things when it comes to therapy? Too much change happening too fast will only make matters worse. Therapy takes time and each person will only be able to assimilate things at their own pace? An immediate expectation of results in a specific time frame will put undo pressure on the process I think? We're talking years here...not months to be sure when it comes to making these kinds of changes but that's not to say that there are not other options available?
What about ADHD coaches who work with you over the phone? I would tend to lean more in that direction in getting more immediate results with the caveat.....that they need to be ready and willing and are not needing more behavioral therapy than just the "how to's?"
Behavioral therapy as I see it...is different than the nuts and bolts of "how to do things differently". That will take longer if that is what is needed?
Moving as I see it....would be the last choice after online or phone contacts were exhausted first? When I say online....I'm not thinking in terms of "self help" and a more tailored personal one on one approach with some personal advise and attention devoted to each persons situation and needs?
I know my T has worked with clients by phone but I think that was after he already saw them in person and this was only after they moved. Having said that....one on one over the phone....might be better than moving?
If I'm not mistaken...I think I recall that Melissa Orlov might work with people over the phone but I might not be absolutely correct in saying that. She would be someone I would trust to know the particulars of someone with ADHD or at least....know someone who could help?
J