I just need to vent a bit.

I'm the one whose non treated/non diagnosed ADHD BF walked away from our 3.5 year relationship without a word after a big fight (in which his alleged, by me, ADHD was in question...he both admits it and denies it and has always adamantly refused to change or work on a relationship).

This all happened the day after Thanksgiving.  He has not spoken one word to me since, completely ignoring any attempts to communicate (we are long distance).  So, I have begun trying to heal myself and accept that the relationship is over.  I have been going through the usual roller coaster of emotions...anger, sadness, hurt, etc.etc.   But, one I struggle with a lot if the sadness of not being there for him.  We started out as friends...and while I am angry and hurt that he put the final brick in his wall and cut me off like our relationship meant nothing, my heart still hurts for him and what he is going through and will go through if he continues to chose not to accept what I FIRMLY believe is ADHD (and some co-morbid issues as well...though I admit I am no doctor).  I hurt for how many people have given up on him and how now I am lumped into that category, even though I did not end things...I just feel he has labeled me as such.  I am sad that I didn't know then what I know now.  I miss him.  I only ever wanted to have a happy, healthy relationship (but don't we all??).  I wish he could see what I see...about what a good man is inside of him and how he really is loved.

None of this is to say that I am ignoring the angst and hurt that I felt during the relationship (after the awesome hyperfocus stage)...but rather that I am sad for so many things now...am so stuck.  I cannot do ANYthing now but accept all of this and move on.  Ironically, that was one of  big his issues with me...the fact that I couldn't stop "poking us with a stick" or "let things go".

Just needed to vent...I'm through a lot of the anger stage and sitting in the sadness one...