I can't seem to leave him...I could give him breaks, and go about my days but, after a few days has gone, I would be right back with him...He is very disrespectful and unkind at times, and I don't think I want to spend the rest of my life with him...I want to move on and I can't,I don't have it in me to break it off ,and it has me very frustrated.I don't know if I should start therapy b/c of this and try to come up with some decision soon.I would try to ignore him and go about my days but then he would do something really mean that would make me resent him really bad...like he continues to ogle women..look at porn..lies and lies like crazy.I am not even sure if he really ever cheated on me I have not seen signs of that,but I know he loves to look at porn all week long"every night"...porn and sex addiction...marijuana addiction...rum addiction.....gambling addiction..WOW!! he has so many bad habits.I am a practicing Muslim and I don't eat pork,and he would go in to the supermarket and buy pork and cook it and I would be hungry and he does not give a damn about my religion or my way of following up on my rights..he breaks all the rules and continues to do all the things that would piss me off...

He has this way of manipulating me..like one time he would take me out and give me the most romantic night and then a next night he is spitting in my face and throwing me on the bed..I want to leave him and I don't know why I can't leave him.Having a hard time trying to decide what to do,how to do it,when to do it,I am very sad and unhappy with leaving him, also staying with him..he is very boldface and likes to bully me around at times,sometimes he is like the husband I dreamt of then he is my perfect stranger/enemy.I can't deal with this up and down relationship for too much longer I want out and I am scared to do it...scared to be alone and by myself..I don't know where to begin.

lovehurts...