Hello, I am a twenty-three year old husband and father. I have an extreme case of ADHD. I was diagnosed as a child and have never grew out of it. Instead it seemed to worsen over time for me. As a child I had many nicknames such as the son of the Devil in fact my ADHD was so bad I was suspended and almost expelled my second day of Kidnergarden. Yes I took medications which did help some but it was too late I was already alienated from everyone including my own family which has lasted even to this day. For awhile I actually had control of my ADHD probaly because i was always active physically and mentally. But as i turned 20 it seemed to comeback but at an even worse rate. I have now even gotten a severely bad temper in which I yell, scream and argue even more now with my wife whose is a non-ADHD spouse than I did as a child. Whats also worse is that I used to try to do things around the house but now I plan and promise to do something but I never do not even the dishes. I used to spend a lot of time with my wife before but now its rare if I do if when she begs and cries for me to I still don't . Its even hard for me to pay attention to my child instead I am usually either watching TV, playing video games, on the computer, or some other stupid thing. I even started to treat our dog badly since our daughter was born. I have no kind of income or anything right now to afford our rent, and other bills let alone the medication or doctor visit. By the way there are not many jobs here in the area including fast food. So the stress added to it is making me even worse as to where i don't really want to do much but eat, sleep, and watch TV. I have no idea what to do because this is causing a major strain in my marriage and more. So can anyone please help me or any advice you can give will be appreciated. Thank you for your time and patience.
What must I do
Submitted by devinandkendra on 10/03/2008.
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Submitted by van fanel on
just show ur family that its not ur fault that u act this way i feel the same i got adhd add aspergers and god knows what else and all i ever do is cause problems for my family so u see ur not alone trust me my family my gf and my friends are the most valuable ppl in my life idk where id be without them
Finding Ways to Treat ADD without Money
Submitted by MelissaOrlov on
You are in a terrible position, and your anger and depression are hurting everyone around you. Though you may not be able to find a job, you must figure out how to start treating your ADD, even if you have no money. Once you start treating your ADD, you may well find that other things fall into place for you.
The way to do this is buried in your note - start exercising. EVERY day. If you aren't exercising now, start in slowly enough so that you don't injure yourself. But you need to work yourself into an aerobically-induced sweat for at least 45 minutes a day, for a minimum of 5 days a week (given your symptoms, I would suggest 7 days a week). Since you're not employed, don't tell me you don't have time to do it.
Aerobic is important here - weight lifting is fine, if you want to do it in addition to the aerobic, but not instead. The reason has to do with how your body responds to this particular type of exercise. Research shows that you will be calmer, less anxious, less depressed, and more focused. You need ALL of these changes!
Do you have a bike already? If so, one option is to get a bike stand off EBay or something (front fork should be stable - i.e. you take the front wheel off the bike not the stand that you have to balance on). You can put this in front of the tv and pedal away (vary the speed and resistance - I always push harder during the ads!). Or, perhaps you like to run? Perhaps you can walk very fast for multiple miles? Remember - the point is to SWEAT, and to do it for about 45 minutes a day, minimum. Dance Dance Revolution is also a great way to sweat aerobically, and your child (if old enough) can join you. Be creative. What you do doesn't matter (as long as it is aerobic and lasts long enough). As Nike says "just do it"!
Instead of a trainer, save money by getting a friend to do it with you. A regular time with a friend to exercise will keep you from not doing it. Keep a list of what you've done and how long, if you feel you need to put your feet to the fire a bit.
EVery time you think you don't have the energy, remind yourself that the exercise will give you energy, plus it is like MEDICINE for people with anxiety, depression and ADD. FREE medicine.
Isn't it time to get back into synch with your wife and child? Try this for a month - just one month - and you'll be amazed at the difference you feel in yourself and about others.