A liberating thought today. Many of my worst fears have already happened.
The marriage has gone down an abyss of dishonesty and pain. Children are absent half the time. They might not like me with time, they will grow up with ambivalence about my love for them. I've lost most old friends, relatives. Hopes and dreams.
Went for a Sunday walk alone. Lovely Autumn day. Many people outside with friendly faces. Everyone says hello. Little kids playing.
Discover I'm happy to be alive, happy to be divorced. Those worst fears have all played out and I'm still happy today.
Isn't that something.
I feel like it's doable to live with the coming of new challenges. All the worst things happen, but for the moment there's some rest. I feel content to just watch life happen for a while.
Thank you everyone for your presence on the forum and for the kindness you show.
Swedish, There's Something to Be Said.....
Submitted by J on
for hitting the lowest point in your life, where you question wheather this life thing is even worth it ( I've never contemplated suicide or even entertained that notion ) but you still question it, and wonder what's the use?
Then over time, you lift yourself up out of that darkness and start taking the first steps towards living again. Living, where you enjoy life, and everything becomes worth it and your happy again. I've been there, more times than I'd like to admit.
So good for you! You're a surviver! You made it through to the other side to live another day! That feeling like the worst thing that could ever happen, happened.....and if something like that ever happened again, you know you'll be okay. It's a good feeling isn't it?
It's a good day to die I always say....I'm so happy to hear your okay.
J
They’ll love the new you
Submitted by Catterfly on
Hi Swedish,
I'm so glad to hear that you've found a moment of happiness!
What you said about lost friends and relatives, and the children's feelings of ambivalence towards you, really resonated with me. I have the same conflicts in my past, and fears in my future.
I keep reminding myself that old friends and relatives met the me that was enduring abuse. She was angry and bitter and frustrated that she couldn't find a way to fix the marriage.
I only left a month ago, and already I'm looking forward to people meeting the real me. The relatives who stayed with me report that I'm glowing, my eyes are bright and even the fine lines around my eyes are disappearing.
We will make new friends, and our children will enjoy spending time with our happy mom selves!! Just keep doing whatever you can to bring her out.
I'm off to outside yoga in the new fall forest. I know that's a favourite of yours, too! Will send you good vibes. :)
That's lovely. Small things.
Submitted by honestly on
That's lovely. Small things. That's where joy lives, I honestly believe.
x
Thank you
Submitted by Swedish coast on
Thank you all for extending your generosity to me.
In hopes we'll all have more serene moments of happiness.
Thank you Swedish
Submitted by Elliej on
Hi Swedish
You have shown resilience in the most difficult time of your life. A time that i hope never darkens you again. Thank you for the support you have also given this group. Im not that active anymore, but we are in similar situations so i often check in to see how you are. Each day you grow stronger, though the residual pain and scars linger. Keep going. You deserve peace x