Over 15 years ago, when I was feeling unhappy in my relationship, my husband asked me what the chore he should take over. To his surprise, I said ‘do the dishes!!!’ Turns out, I’m not the only one who feels this way. Sharing dish duties turns out to be really important to a whole lot of women.
People with ADHD commonly have significant sleep issues, and couples impacted by ADHD often have radically different sleep schedules, with the ADHD partners being night owls and sometimes sporadic sleepers, and exhausted non-ADHD partners often falling into bed at a very early hour. Here’s how ADHD-impacted couples can do much better in this area.
You have an opportunity to be involved in research that will help counselors understand how better to help couples impacted by adult ADHD in a really important arena - sex.
Statistics about how many couples are impacted by one or more emotional or physical affairs are hard to believe, for obvious reasons, not least of which is that estimates vary so widely. They range from 20-60% of men and 20-40% of women having an affair at some point in their relationship. No matter the exact number, the bottom line is that a large number of couples experience this form of betrayal at some point in their partnership, often after that affair has been going on for a while.
I posted recently about bed times and got several questions about how to get bedtimes aligned better. I work with couples on this issue with great regularity - those with ADHD often go to bed late, while exhausted non-ADHD partners often go to bed early. Couples miss out on good time to connect when they hit the bedroom at different times. Here are some ideas to help:
Too many couples find that Valentine’s Day is a yearly reminder of what they don’t have – the “picture perfect” marriage with both partners arriving home with red roses, a bottle of wine and sex on their minds. Like in the magazines, right?! Except that’s not how it happens for many couples, particularly if you are struggling in your relationship. So here are four tips for surviving what may be the worst Hallmark Card holiday of them all!
Why do partners struggle so much with porn use? What's the big deal? This article provides my observations based upon working with couples faced with this issue.
Have you ever wondered what’s a “normal” sex life? There is so much buzz around the topic of sex in the forums right now, I think it’s time to write about sex – what might be going on if you’re having too little…and then I’ll write about getting away from porn and sex addiction in another post.
Hi, Ned Hallowell here. I noticed questions about being distracted during sex. I saw some great suggestions, from Melissa and others. Let me add one more thought.
I spend a lot of time helping non-ADD spouses understand how to interpret their ADD husband’s actions (or, more frequently, inactions – a word I use without judgment.) I think it’s time to write a piece for the ADD male about what non-ADD women want.
