When I talk about lying problems in relationships, I'm not just talking about partners with ADHD. Either partner can lie...and lies also exist in relationships in which there is no ADHD. But there are some ways that the presence of ADHD increases the chances that one or the other partner will lie. To be able to chart the best course to move away from lying in your own relationship, you must first understand why the lying is happening.
Is lying a part of your relationship? Are you eager to move past the lies to a more trusting partnership? This is the first of several posts that will deal with lies and rebuilding trust in relationships impacted by ADHD.
Adults with ADHD often suffer from co-existing conditions that can make their lives – and the lives of their partners – even more complicated. Here is a list of seven of the most common conditions that ride along with ADHD and information about why it's important to understand if you have any of them.
“It is not me nor my spouse that is broken. It is the relationship that is broken.” These wise words were posted in the forum not too long ago. A breath of fresh air and some great perspective – so much clearer than blaming your partner!
Chances are, you’ve heard that tone of voice. The one that sounds demeaning to you…aggressive…just short of an insult and a put down…the tone that puts your teeth on edge.
Chances are also good that you’ve not only heard it, but used it yourself…and your partner hates it.
What happens when you are your partner reach an impasse about how to move forward in your relationship? I got email today from a woman who wrote about how she and her husband are ‘stuck.’ She wants to work on repair, while he expects her to ‘act like nothing has happened in the last five years and move on’…including have sex together.
You have an opportunity to be involved in research that will help counselors understand how better to help couples impacted by adult ADHD in a really important arena - sex.
Statistics about how many couples are impacted by one or more emotional or physical affairs are hard to believe, for obvious reasons, not least of which is that estimates vary so widely. They range from 20-60% of men and 20-40% of women having an affair at some point in their relationship. No matter the exact number, the bottom line is that a large number of couples experience this form of betrayal at some point in their partnership, often after that affair has been going on for a while.
