ADHD and Marriage Blog

ADD & Marriage: Non-ADD Spouses Who “Give Too Much”

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 06/05/2009.

It seems as if a lot of non-ADD spouses at this site have been bending over backwards to accommodate their ADD spouse’s issues, often finding that doing so is exhausting and making them angry and miserable.  I would like to suggest that while negotiating how to meet somewhere in the middle is a part of all marriages, many non-ADD spouses are giving (and giving in) way too much.  Let me explain –

Getting Chores Better Distributed through the Family

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 06/01/2009.

It’s awful to feel as if you are the only one who is doing chores around your household – not to mention exhausting. Here are some ideas for redistributing the housework from my own experience.

Surprise! Accommodating the Non-ADD Spouse

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 05/13/2009.

If, like me, you are a non-ADD spouse, it’s easy to dwell on the aspects of ADD that are inconvenient and troubling.  But what about those things that an ADD spouse might find inconvenient about a non-ADD spouse, but which often don’t get voiced?  I came up against this last night when in a conversation with my husband about how quickly the ADD mind works.

Getting Past Relationship Ambivalence in ADD Marriages

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 05/11/2009.

Stay or leave?  That is a question that many exhausted spouses ask as they struggle through the rollercoaster of feelings in their ADD-affected relationship.  At the suggestion of one of the readers of this site I have just finished reading a very interesting book about how to resolve this ambivalence and I think it could be an excellent resource for many here.

What is ADHD Coaching?

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 05/11/2009.

Tara McGillicuddy is an active ADHD coach and educator.  Her online work, in particular, has brought coaching to a much larger audience of people who might benefit from it.  I asked her to put together an overview of ADHD coaching to post here. 

If You Are Engaged to Someone with ADHD

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 04/20/2009.

There have been quite a few comments lately on this site suggesting that people should avoid marrying someone with ADD.  This advice makes me very uneasy and I would like to weigh in on it.

Attacking Inconsistency of Focus in ADD Marriages

Submitted by MelissaOrlov on 04/07/2009.

Are you angry that your ADD spouse is able to focus on something of great interest to him, and not to anything you want him to do (like the dishes, or childcare)? If so, you would not be alone.

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