hi its me again this will be quick but im clinicaly depressed and have no energy left to surport my family (husband adhd and 3 children adhd ) ive surported and done everything in my power for them now im at a wall and everything ive done i feel i failed .

the children do not respect me and they just dont get it i need them now , but i know they cant help it but what do i do to not feel angry towards them when its not their fault ive failed.

my husband amazinly is noticing our crazy life we live and last nite he read same blogs and he said i realize how its hard for the non adhd spouse to cope.but does mean he will do anything now who knows

thankyou for reading i just dont know were us non adhd surporters do when u are at that lowest point in your life 

i love adhd so please dont get me wrong its just iam in ablack hole and its not their fault

I was diagnosed with Adult ADD ten years ago and I have tried so many medications that did not work: Strattera, Adderal XR, Provigil, Vyvanse, Wellbutrin and Adderall.  All are higher doses.  For the past 7 years I have been taking 90mg of Adderall a day.  My doctor told me I could either take 90mg in the morning or 60mg in the morning and 30mg at noon.  The problem I have been having lately is if I take the 90mg at 8am by 11am it wears off and I bounce.  If I do 60 and 30, I can't even tell I've taken the 30mg.  I've asked my doctor over and over if there is something else I can try and he keeps saying, "No," and he says 90mg is the most I can take.  I am a big guy, but I've lost 140 pounds since August, so he keeps saying my ADD symptoms will improve as I lose weight.  I can't tell that they have, but lately, they seem to be getting worse.  I can't focus for anything and I am falling behind at work.  For 70% of the day I feel like I am in a cloud.  There has to be something else I can do...Any suggestions?  I have an appointment with a different doctor later this week and would like to ask him to put me on something other than the adderall, so if anyone has had the same problems I've been having, the advice would be much appreciated.

hi im new to this site but ive been reading articles for a few weeks and got some interesting info let me tell u about my situation.i am a wife of a lovely inspiring husband of 16yrs and ive been with him for 26yrs he has been diagnosed with adhd and he is medicated since 1 1/2 yrs ago and he suffers from anxiety we have got three bueitiful children my eldest daughter is 13yrs old has had adhd since 4yrs old and suffers anxiety/depression and now coping with teenhood she is medicated since 7 she has been a great kid upto now she is very demanding and hard to handle and my son is 11yrs old and he has got adhd and has had it sincebirth  he has been medicated since then and my youngest and most challenging daughter is 9 and has had adhd and odd since birth and is medicated for adhd since 2.

as u can see a very busy household there has been  long road since my life with adhd has got larger and i have been their for all of them through every and still am.The children need constant attention and complain one of the other siblings get more and i love them more.they dont let me have my lone time with my husband who works a full time job and is struggling with life as adhd people do but he has done amaverlous job of changing his way.i have focused my time on all thier issues and have forgot about myself ive done so much research and got counsling help about them all.But now i am extremely depressed and have suffered from anxiety since child ive had a hard childhood so i dont have contact with my family so of cause no surport there im tring very had to ocus om my needs and health from suggestions of my therapist and dr but of course the children wont allow me to thier always first and as im struggling now they seem to be playing up more.They give no sign of caring about me and helping.But i will get better and start focusing on my wonderful family of joy and always new challenges.All ive ever wanted was for my husband and children tobe happy and relize their special individuals and i want them to know ill never give up and i dont mean to get to this low point in my life.My husband works full time and is dealing with me the best way he can but i feel he does not care or love me just as the children i know they do but i feel alone in this dark time of my life but i will spring back and they can be proud of me and i can help our family again any suggestions welcome thankyou for letting me dribble on but it helped to let it out

Hi. I'm new to the site and am looking for some help. This may be a long post! My husband informed me 4 weeks ago that he wants a divorce. There is a lot of reasons why but since he's told me this I've been thinking a lot about our marriage and what went wrong. Something that was there from the beginning was my husbands strange behavior. We often joked he had ADD but I didn't know enough about it to really know for sure if that is what he had. I eventually chaulked it up as who he was and tried to deal with him the best I could. He would even at times say he thought he had it becuase he would lose things and lose concentration but ignored it. The sad thing is I feel that his issues took such a toll on me that I started to have mental issues. I have OCD (just checking things) and this got so severe and I feel it was due to the stress I was under for so many years. I suffered from anxiety and my husband said I was so up tight but looking back I think it was because of what I was dealing with. Since he's been gone is has almost completely stopped! Somehow he convinced me I was mental and I spent 2 years in therapy. This whole time I was trying to fix my issues and deeply commited to making things better. My husband while saying he was supportive really sat back and waited for me to change for him. Now after reading I think he suffers from ADD and I was not really crazy after all. Anyways I wanted to write about what I experienced and see if you guys think.

My husband would never really help around the house unless I stayed on him about it. He would leave dirty socks at the door and drop his clothes anywhere. He would leave every cabinent door open or every drawer. He left every light on in the house. He could clean if he put his mind to it but for the most part it was just my job because it was the only way it would get done.

He would never take care of anything. He seemed to break everything. He would leave expensive tools out and say, it would be fine. He lost or broke cell phones and expensive gadgets. It's like everything was disposable. If it broke he'd just get a new one. I hated him borrowing anything because there was a good chance he would leave it out or something.

He would get obsessive about a new hobby or "toy" and read every magazine about it or get really depressed and mopey if we couldn't afford it. I got to where I gave in becuase I couldn't stand how mopey he would act. If he did find a way to do the hobby he would soon forget about it and be ready to start a new one. He tells me now he was so miserable with me he was looking for happiness but I've never seen someone go through so many ideas and hobbies. It's funny his dad does the exact same thing. He would leave jobs because he was sick of them and didn't feel he was getting paid what he was worth. He would start a new job and several weeks into complain how he should have never left the last. He decided to be an EMT last year and obsessed over getting to school for it. He graduated and started working in the ER but already complains about it and now is obsessed with being a nurse. (a reason he's wanting a divorce too is so he can pursue his dreams of going back to school) Right now he even wants this divorce TODAY. I mean it's been 4 weeks and he wants to get it all done. I honestly feel it's one of his split decsions. I'm sure he believes it's going to solve everything, but is he going to have any regret a few months down the road.

He was always purchasing things when I told him we didn't have the money. He'd open new credit cards after we had refinanced the house to pay off debt. I handled all of the bills and I could never seem to keep up on his spending so our bank account was always out of control. I stayed stressed to the max and always had to ask my parents for help.

He often came home upset that he had been yelled at on a job or something but would always blame someone else or say there was a reason. I know he often lost tools or couldn't find things on the job and I know good and well his employers must feel like I do but if I would try to nicely explain maybe why they were mad he'd blow up and say i'm not supportive.

These are just a few of the things! I'm devasted because I tried hard to except and love him for who he was and the tension got too much and now he says he never loved me and wants me out of his life. I feel I sacrificed my mental health for him and now he dumps me. We did have good times and it's funny if we were doing something he was into or excited about he seemed so happy and affectionate but if he was bored with life he seemed to take it out on me. He drank a lot and says it was because of me but I don't know about that. I think unless he gets help he's going to stay miserable. Maybe one day he'll see it wasn't really about me.

Anyways, I'd just like some input and maybe some support.