Recent Comments

  • by: J - 3 weeks 5 days ago
    Not only from the more recent past in short relationships, where the men only wanted sex, but  from long ago when she was sexually abused at age 13 by her sisters husband who lived in the house at the time. She's even mentioned that her therapist had speculated current issues from the past but she didn't continue with the therapist long enough to get that part sorted out. I'm sure these things exacerbate our situation but I don't think it's at the heart of the matter. We haven't had sex for a year an half...
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: J - 3 weeks 5 days ago
    are very different.  My top two are touch and quality time. Her top two are acts of service and gifts. Her's are easy for me....mine for her is where our problem together begins. That is a good idea however...asking her what would be more comfortable instead. In the big picture though....any initiation on my part in showing affection, romance, love but especially sex has appeared to be the biggest issue. Me initiating anything along these lines is what seems to trigger her. So even talking about it or...
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: Swedish coast - 3 weeks 5 days ago
    I'm sorry Adele, that sounds so heart wrenching. 
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: AdeleS6845 - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    Perhaps her behavior stems from things that happened in past relationships.  With my fiance, I sometimes react that way.  I was married to someone who only gave me positive attention when he wanted sex.
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: Haveaniceday - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    Thank you c ur self, I totally agree, and have to always keep in mind that while our teen is 17,  looks 20, has the life experience of someone at least that age (we've travelled / moved internationally and have been exposed to much), has the executive functioning of say a 13 year old, lives in a society where kids grow up really quickly and can legally do a lot more than other countries, and is exposed to a universe of sometimes questionable ideas on social media - we can only but expect some very...
    >>> on Forum topic - Support group for parents?

  • by: AG - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    Interesting J..... I sometimes react same to my husband. I wonder if having a conversation about it and asking her her opinions, exploring her preferences of "love language" maybe hers are not touch like yours are.   Ask her what she would want you to do instead of gazing, moving in etc....
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: c ur self - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    The world of responsibility & accountability will demand your children (like us all) grow and adhere to appropriate behaviors in all aspects of life...Know matter what knowledge we feel we have about a mind condition, we should teach, love and discipline all children the same...(Recognizing of course the realities of their abilities)....I hope you find an informative group who are learning through living it....
    >>> on Forum topic - Support group for parents?

  • by: J - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    I'm not doing this all the time any more as I did when we first got together yet this reaction is pretty consistent under the same circumstances.  It's just happened enough now that I can see the pattern.
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: J - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    I'm coming back to something you said.."many times, they go straightforward to bewilderment"  Something happened this morning that has happened before but this time it clicked. When I'm feeling attracted to my SO, and especially feeling in the mood to express these feelings, I'll do certain little tell tales like: gazing, moving closer ( moving in ) changing the tone of my voice which usually ends up with me kissing her. And depending on her mood...this behavior appears to be more annoying than welcome....
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: c ur self - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    There are reason's for sickness and weak immune systems...Anything that produces stress in the mind an body can effect the immune system....Although there are other things that do the same....(Sleep loss, vitamin deficiency, allergies, environment, etc..)
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD and inflammation

  • by: c ur self - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    Unless I see human nature (the birth minds of human's) the way my creator see's it...It will always produce bewilderment and unanswered questions about the actions of others, as well as my own thoughts and actions.... c
    >>> on Forum topic - The unkindness

  • by: c ur self - 3 weeks 6 days ago
    When we push for perfection (which we know is unattainable, and I have sadly fit that mold before) we may be leaving a lot of things in our wake...Any false reality I demand to see myself in, usually ends or prevents ownership of what God an others are truly seeing....
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: J - 4 weeks 2 hours ago
    Hi WildBill, As far as the communication part you mentioned, I've found learning conversations are extremely helpful. Melissa was the first person who introduced them to me and they work, not just with an ADHD partner but with everyone. I use them all the time now and they're becoming a natural part of my communication repertoire. They work specifically to find mispoken words that a person doesn't realize they've said. I do that a lot myself and catch myself saying them quite often. If someone tells me I'...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD vs Anxiety

  • by: adhd32 - 4 weeks 1 day ago
    I have found with today's medical community you have to push for answers. I moved to the south from a big northeastern city and the medical care here is barely adequate.  Wrong diagnosis at urgent care caused hubs a 3 day hospitalization, for example.  I had an issue and 5 different specialist visits later to finally get answers and ultimately surgery.  We encounter dismissive, irritated Drs who don't listen and discount your intelligence even though they know nothing about you.  You know something is...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD vs Anxiety

  • by: Swedish coast - 4 weeks 1 day ago
    I'm sorry you've had this experience. My family members have been evaluated for ADHD by a specialist pair (psychiatrist and psychologist). It's been friendly and very professional. My child wasn't upset. My ex husband wasn't comfortable, but I believe he still answered everything truthfully. What I don't know is whether a person who wants to avoid an ADHD diagnosis can bend the results by their answers on the questionnaires and interview. Is it possible your wife wanted to downplay her symptoms, or...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD vs Anxiety

  • by: AG - 4 weeks 1 day ago
    I really feel for you, ive been here!  This is extremely frustrating- beyond words.  I'd go find another provider if possible.  My husband was wrongfully diagnosed with anxiety at first, and treated with anxiety/ depression meds for months- (by a PA from primary doc office). Nightmare!   18 months later He ended up getting a full workup with an ADHD specialist and an official diagnosis He still wants to use his primary Dr (a different one now) for his ADHD medication management but here's where we...
    >>> on Forum topic - ADHD vs Anxiety

  • by: 2lawyers - 4 weeks 1 day ago
    Only a small portion of what you describe sounds like ADHD symptoms. You need a lawyer before you need a banker. I don't know the laws in your country. In the U.S. I would say try to find one who knows both divorce and bankruptcy. Getting a fee from the bankruptcy estate is probably the only way they will get paid. I am so thankful you are not tied to this man by joint children. I highly suggest moving in temporarily with anybody to avoid cohabitating any longer. The fact that he called the police to...
    >>> on Forum topic - Help me Divorce

  • by: Swedish coast - 4 weeks 1 day ago
    I never thought I'd need to protect myself from him wanting to hurt me. But here we are.
    >>> on Forum topic - The unkindness

  • by: J - 1 month 10 min ago
    My last comment just connected something for me in terms of "perfection" or being a "perfectionist". Part of my understanding of what RSD is .in terms of symptoms, is becoming a perfectionist.  This idea is pretty clear to me now. Being a perfectionist makes a person immune to criticism or beyond reproach. If you're perfect...no one can say anything...you're safe from being criticized and feeling shame....or being exposed as "less than perfect". It's a subconscious defense mechanism against being...
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

  • by: J - 1 month 8 min ago
    Just because a person has ADHD doesn’t mean we don't do the exact same thing ( maybe more ? ) by responding judgementally to things beyond our understanding. It's a natural thing to do, but it appears as hypocrital when we're pointing fingers while doung the same thing ourselves. Especially when we're far less than perfect. As they say, people who live in glass houses shouldn't throw rocks. I'm really beginning to solidify my understand of all of this better. I've always understand the concept that...
    >>> on Forum topic - Understanding how OCD, Anxiety RSD and Emotional Lability work

Pages