Recent forum posts (all topics)

  • Newbie needing support and advice by: frustratedinfla 10 years 3 months ago

    my DH (fiancé) and I have been together for five years.  All was fine and has been up until two months ago when we got him in to the psychiatrist to get his Prozac regulated (for OCD) he has been on a HIGH dose for like 20+years and needs to decrease it.. So she tells him that she feels he has ADHD and OCPD.  His behaviors before were okay, I mean he's a successful physician, raised three kids alone, has his stuff together, lived alone for 20 years..  

    Our backstory, we met on a dating sight and it was love at first sight. We have been inseparable, he's the one I want to grow old with and spend the ret of my life with. His job forced him to relocate two years ago, so we got engaged and my kids and I moved in with him.

    He starts Vyvanse 30 mg I think in May 2014 and by like 5-7 he's fading, tired needs sleep.  Cranky.  We are arguing all the time. I start getting weird headaches in June and go to the neurologist ... Have a headache for a month and they out me on Topamax! Now I'm crying all the time this med is along me crazy, I have no desire to do anything so I weaned myself off and told my dr what was going on. Without topamax I started having clarity again. But the problem was I was not myself and he wasn't himself so I can't even gauge the first month he started taking meds because we were both off. But now I wondered if my headache might be my body's way to dealing with how mean his behavior was and I was so stressed out? The dr tells him some people need a booster in the afternoon to get you through the rest of the day, so she puts him on a low dose 10 or 20 mg Adderall. This seems to help but he's happy at work and an ahole after work. Which isn't fair to me that he's at his best at work and turns into Dr Hyde when he gets home!   The littlest things set him off, he rants and raves like a madman and says mean things. But then tells me it's not him it's his brain works different now, he can't stop himself from saying these things. Mostly via text and if I answer it provokes another mean response. He says to just ignore him and don't answer. Feels terrible afterwards. If he actually says something mean, I'm supposed to brush it off and ignore him and not take it personally! But how?

     

    The dr puts him on Adderall XR 30mg during the day and the Adderall 30 mg I believe in the afternoon but it STILL changes his behavior.  I constantly walk on egg shells, afraid to piss him off. He says I treat him different and don't love him anymore. Then breaks down and doesn't want to be alone and is afraid I'm going to leave him.  I love him and I know he's still in there but I think these amphetamines are making him crazy and I can't rationalize with him.  He says he knows it's him. If I say something he hears it different and if he says something to me, it usually comes out wrong and hurts my feelings and makes me cry.  He has very IMPULSIVE behavior sometimes too, like we are on a motorcycle vacation and he got it in his head that we could make it somewhere in five minutes before a store closed. We'll needless to say, he made a wrong choice on some wet grass, luckily, and he laid the bike down in the grass and we both fell off! Luckily not hurt but it scared the S$&@$$&&t out of me. And when I asked him what the hell that was the angry Dr Hyde came out and was just spewing mean things again that I'm supposed to just brush off.

    I haven't changed but I do shut down and get quiet when he says mean things because I'm trying to Avoid a confrontation. He knows we need therapy or counseling and is willing but reluctant to change his meds because he likes the way the amphetamines make him feel but wants us back 

    I'm trying to educate myself on ADHD and how to help him and if I tell him something I learned he may think it's dumb and won't even try it or "just because it's on the internet doesnt mean its a true fact"  or makes me feel dumb for bringing it up. Or we have a disagreement because he hears it one way and I said it another. No feel like it's depressing me, I cry a lot because my feelings get hurt easily, I feel like I need something for depression or something for anxiety to be able to deal with him. 

    Right now I'm dealing with this. 

    I can't give him my opinion on anything, because to him it's unsolicited advice 
    I can't talk about his amphetamine because he is touchy about it, even though as soon as he started taking the amphetamines his behavior changed and moods changed
    I shut down when he is mean and it hurts my feelings but he says I'm supposed to just ignore it and brush it off
    I treat him different he says
    If I do say something that he doesnt agree with, I'm picking on him
    I'm supposed to change ALL my patterns and behaviors when the obvious and simple answer is he need either more meds or a different med because HE changed starting these amphetamines

    We have a very hard time communicating right now because he hears things totally different than what I say and things he says to me don't come out right. We've only had sex like three times in a month now. He gets so engrossed in projects that he forgets what time it is, we've even tried,setting times like in 30 minutes you need to come in here and let's get a shower and something always comes up that takes him longer. Or he can stay in the garage for two hours and get lost. Or stay in his office listening to music .. The same music for hours.

     

    thanks for listening :-) and any help you can offer is GREATLY appreciated. 

     

  • New here, need someone to talk to by: Discombobulated 10 years 3 months ago

    Hi, I recently stumbled onto this site when I was searching the internet once (again) for help on what could be wrong in my marriage.  What really spoke to me on this blog was the list of symptoms that occur in your marriage when one partner has ADD.   I have known for the past 19+ years that something wasn't right but couldn't figure out what.  I just don't know what to do and I need someone to talk to. 

    My husband can be sweet, kind and caring...sometimes.  The other times he is blaming, angry, bitter.  In the past during fights he has screamed at me that I better go get a lawyer.  I never know which husband I will get.  The other day he called me out of the blue to thank me everything that I do, and went on about how I am amazing and I do things that he is not even aware of.  Less than 24 hours later he was angry with me and telling me that my best is not good enough and that I don't try hard enough. 

    He owns his own business and now I work there too, plus we have 4 children.  I am highly educated and used to have my own successful career, but once the children came I was unable to maintain the level of committment needed to continue, plus have a babies and basically be left on my own (he refused to drive the baby to the sitter's when we both worked and I would routinely come home to an empty dark house after picking up my baby from care after putting in a 10 hour day.)   His only focus is working & paying the bills, and for I am grateful that he provides for us.  But there is a cost, because by default I am responsible for everything else:  raising the children, managing the household, all the cleaning, driving the kids around, helping kids w/homework & school, grocery shopping, cooking, everything else, etc.  Plus on top of all this I am expected to contribute at work.  There is no way I could go out and get another job because I have no help or support at home.

    I feel I am at the mercy of his whims, or whatever his focus happens to be.  If his focus is bills then I get an earful about how I have mismanaged our money.  If it is work then I am held accountable for not measuring up.  If he feels social then I must scramble and find a babysitter or make plans with other couples at the last moment because he is in a good mood and would like to go out.  I never know what is coming next and I feel like I am constantly walking on eggshells.   One day he will tell me I deserve a day at the spa, the next day if I take the kids to the pool he makes remarks like how it is nice that I have such a "life of leisure."

    After spending some time on this blog and reading Melissa's book I am wondering if he may have some ADD and if that could be contributing to our issues.  However, it will not be possible to discuss any of this with him.  It is impossible to talk to him because in doing so I will trigger his anger.  In past whenever I have tried o set personal boundaries and it has caused great turmoil in our relationship at my expense.  Most things are twisted around and made to be my fault.  If I have an opinion or a thought he acts threatened.  As long as I do everything he wants all is well.  But I am human so I can't do everything, and then he I must endure his anger.   However it is confusing because he is usually absent and totally leaves me alone to fend for myself most of the time.  A normal conversation is impossible with him and we have been fighting about the same things with no resolution for over 19 years.  Everything gets turned around so that it is either my fault, or I am wrong for thinking something is an issue.  I can not go to him and say "Honey something is troubling me can we talk about it" or "I need x in our relationship can you do this for me."  He will either tell me I am wrong to be troubled in the first place, call me a psycho for worrying about it or fight with me about it or sometimes all 3.  I feel he lectures me, lashes out and punishes me at every turn.   I am so confused, exhausted, bewildered and lonely most of the time I don't know what to do or where to turn.  The loneliness is the hardest part.

    Thanks for reading.

  • Relationship advice please (mega conflict.) by: Anonymous (not verified) 10 years 3 months ago

     

    Hi, I have been in a Relationship for 8 months, My partner is living with ADHD because we are in a relationship we are living with it together. I love my man. I really do but there is a lot of conflict and confusion in our relationship. I have read about ADHD.

    Mess, thats ok I can clean its no big deal, Forgetting things, thats ok I will not point them out or make them too big.

    My partner does have a past thing, which I do not want to discuss but it took alot of understanding on my part and real soul searching to come to terms with and accept, He then betrayed me and did the same thing that had caused alot of trouble for him and he had lost all but 1 of his friends. we went and spoke to someone about this problem and he was extremely defensive and it seemed he didn't take responsibility for his actions and certainly didnt understand why I was upset about this. This issue caused me major anxiety. We had gone to see our relationship councilor and he basically said "Marcus walked out of their as if he was perfect and had nothing to work on." This issue continues to be a threat to all he has worked for.  Its tough cause after all this rightly or wrongly I still stand by him.  

    We have a lot of trouble communicating which causes conflicts to escalate, problems to remain unresolved and a lot of confusion he will talk about something and give 3 or so different versions of events etc. We go through a pastern of conflict me wanting to work things out by talking them through, He then withdraws, wont communicate at all blames me for everything, were fine for a few weeks then things blow up and the circle begins again, Things don't seem to get resolved.

    He says he wants forever and so do I sometimes i feel hopeful other times not at all.

    I like to communicate and love a good conversation,I am an open book to him, I am completely upfront and honest but I don't get the same. my partner communicates facts current affairs etc  but doesn’t communicate on a personal level. As a result of this I feel like I don’t really know him.  I feel unheard, at times uncared for and often dismissed. We have had a lot of arguments and whenever We try to talk through them and resolve them It feels like they get worse as I do not feel that he understands me or wants to listen. He has made a number of hurtful comments and when I ask what he means he completely shuts down and won’t talk. He is free to express what ever opinion he likes but if mine is different he takes that as an attack on him and he feels that I am telling him he is wrong.

    He has made some comments which has made me question our relationship and his values. Some have been scary, some have been really hurtful and some just confusing. This said we have been in counselling to try and work through this stuff but more often than not it seems to escalate into an argument and leaves us sometimes even further apart. He feels that if we have a different opinion on something he feels like I want to make him change his mind, or that I am saying that he is wrong, which can make him turn aggressive.

    One day after telling me he loves and needs me a day or so later he told me he didn’t need me and that he “just said that to try and bring us closer”. This really hurt and made / makes me second guess everything he says.

    I pointed out that we would have a better relationship if we communicated better and also explained my feelings of feeling unheard and that my thoughts and feelings go ignored. After a session of councelling he tells me that he will work on his communication and withdrawing, Then nothing for a month. I ask again if he would like to do a course, He tells me that he has made enough changes and that he is not going to make more. Then the half an hour later he is booking us in for a course. Now were booked in he says that he thinks our communication is fine. I am really not sure if we are gonna get anything out of this.??

    Its so tough we do not have a sex life its just so tough.

    I am feeling hurt and resentful right now as I have tried to be there whenever he needed me. He broke his foot and I ran after him for 6 weeks ensuring that he was easily able to get to appointments and made sure shopping etc was done and that he was able to relax and recover. There was also the past thing that unfortunately is still affecting him. I have been as supportive as anyone could be. It took a lot to come to terms with this and I put myself on the line whenever something new related to this arose. But after counseling and attempts to discuss and resolve problems we are no closer to resolving our communications problems.

    I am feeling angry resentful defeated and afraid to talk, I feel like I have given my all and made allowances and I am just not getting any clarity.

    I love him this said he has some very nice qualities. I want to understand him but It is really tough when I feel like I am doing most of the work.

    Can I please have some advice, and please be gentle!

     

    I really worry where this is going, If we are compatible, if this is as good as it gets, at times thinking that I should just look after me and at times trying to look after me. My post is not an attack at him or a poor me. I just need some Guidance or encouragement.

     

    Should I continue trying to communicate or should I give up? 

    How Do I deal with this?

    I just have so many questions.

  • cant talk to friends/family -- feeling isolated by: Smokey 10 years 3 months ago

    This is my first post -- 

    I'm wondering about others experience with social support from friends/family. I find that I'm unable to talk to anyone about my ADHD BF of 10 years without getting negative reactions from them, which leaves me feeling judged, not supported. I love him dearly and truly believe in our relationship, but it would be nice if I could discuss the real challenges of ADHD without being looked down on as a weak/codependent woman. Honestly, this sense of isolation is the main reason I am on this forum.

    Judgement comes in many forms. My mom compared him to my ADHD step-father, who doesn't have a good personality with or without ADHD. It's hard to explain how ADHD is not who you are, it's not your personality. Some fixate on the fact that he doesn't have a job although my complaints are mainly emotional, not financial. One person said in an attempt at empathy, "I would be just devastated if something was wrong with my brain, with my thinking...that's who I am." He has made occasional rude or inappropriate comments to my friends out of impulsivity, and isn't really good at friendships in general, which leads my friends to dislike him entirely. Part of it is the stigma about mental health issues and the perception of ADHD as "laziness." They seem to think he should just work through it. The perception is "we all have struggles, look at me, look at what I've accomplished. He should be able to do the same." Of course they don't say this to my face. They know that I will defend him and that criticizing him will just cause a fight. So basically, I stay silent about my relationship with everyone. I find myself guarded even with new friends or coworkers.

    The worst of it is feeling pitied, or feeling like they think I'm co-dependent, needy, obsessive, weak. They think I'm not strong enough to leave, when I never had any need or desire to leave. I'm extremely proud of my relationship, and very much in love. I just wish that I could count on my friends and family for support in my relationship. Every relationship has flaws, and ours happen to be related to ADHD. 

    Does anyone else have this issue???

  • passive-aggressive or possible ADHD by: dedelight4 10 years 3 months ago

    Can anyone tell me if (untreated) adult ADHD has any connection, in any way, with passive-aggressiveness? I've just noticed the similarities (with striking exactness) in my husband with this.

  • How to handle a person's ADHD in social situations without hurting his feelings by: Rach1102 10 years 3 months ago

    I recently started seeing someone and while there are many great qualities about him, the way that he behaves in public makes me uncomfortable. I'm having a really hard time wondering if it's worth it to stay,  how to talk to him without hurting his feelings or making it seem like I'm trying to change him. Also, I've been feeling guilty and awful that it bothers me this much, and maybe the issue is my own. 

    How we met was that he saw me sitting at a table and came right up to me and sat down and started to talk to me. He was REALLY talkative and energetic, (and 8 years younger than me) but I found it endearing that he was confident enough to strike up a conversation with a total stranger. He asked me for my phone number before he left and his personality intrigued me, so I said sure.  We went out on our first date and it went really well... it was just a little different than I was used to, but mostly in a good way. He was really intense and positive in the way that he talked. He asked incredibly deep questions right off the bat because he instantly wanted to really get to know me. Deep and stimulating conversation is very key to him. He would also listen very attentively but also be fidgeting a little while doing so. Then he starts striking up conversations, loudly, with people sitting next to us. For me, being more of a laid back and quiet person, it was different. I appreciated he was so nice and social but it was a little awkward too. However as weeks passed we spent more and more time together. The conversations are almost always deep and challenging intellectually, which is a positive. He is very sweet, caring, and wants to do things to make me happy. We get along, share many of the same values, want the same things, but I'm having a difficult time getting over certain aspects of his ADHD, mainly how he acts in social situations. He is very loud, sometimes inappropriate, and seemingly feels the need to talk to anyone and everyone when we're out in public. For me, where I don't like to be the center of attention, it can get to be pretty embarrassing and uncomfortable. I struggle with this because I also realize it's my own issues of caring too much what others think. But it's also causing me to be nervous about introducing him to my co-workers, friends and family and I realize that's not good. 

    He told me he was diagnosed as a child, associated taking adderol with being stupid, became ultra dependent on them throughout his whole life and found that they numbed him emotionally, and that they caused him to calm down to the point of not wanting to socialize. So, he stopped taking them. He understands that his hyperness can be annoying and he's been told that many times. I just don't know how to express my feelings without coming off as hey, I understand you have a disorder but you need to change in order for it to work. I feel awful and like I'm being a b*tch and that I'm wasting an opportunity for a great relationship because of how he makes me feel in social situations.

    Am I the only one that experiences and struggles with this? Any advice?

  • Is lying part of adult ADHD? Or a separate issue? by: Icefishinglady 10 years 3 months ago

    I don't know why in the world I thought that just because he lies to his customers about why he's not on time, and to his kids/family, that he would NOT lie to me... but is that part of this whole thing? Or is it something else?

    I feel like I should have seen this stuff coming, that my radar is way defective, or maybe *I* am just too defective (NOT pleasant to see that he's been "fishing" for other women). Yeah, it may be a symptom of his impulsivity, but really, the stupid lies he told about it - a child could see through them. I'm pretty sure that if I'd accepted any of his lies he sure wouldn't be falling all over himself to apologize - and the situation would have continued.

    I know one thing - my trust was misplaced. I'm 56; I should know better. *I* have to take care of *me* better than that.

    Asked to talk to him; he said he is "too embarrassed". He keeps apologizing. I can't say "that's okay". I can't say "I forgive you". I just can't.

  • Newbie Looking for Support by: NeedToBreathe 10 years 3 months ago

    Good morning everyone!

    I'm brand new to this forum after finding out my hubbys issues are directly related to ADD. My counselor suggested it could be the cause of his lack of attention, spending all day either in front of the TV or laptop and all the piles of stuff everywhere in our house. I stumbled upon this site and have been reading everything I can get my hands on. I ordered the ADD Effect on Marriage which should be here tomorrow. 

    I'm glad to see I'm not alone but also a bit discouraged that this is such a problem. I can identify myself in so many areas of the forums that it's overwhelming at times. Any direction you can give me as a "newbie" to this issue would be appreciated. Thanks all

  • Just needing to be heard by: Hope to peace 10 years 3 months ago

    I find it interesting how some days I feel so strong in dealing with this and on others I wake up, startled and feeling so alone and confused.  

    The last few days have been good.....but this morning I woke up realizing they have been good because they were all about her!  Not once in these days off together has she asked me what's alive in me right now.  I mean, we have shared to-do lists and getting tasks done but every feeling or meaningful conversation has been around her.  They have been about her ex, her son, her prescription issues, her doctor appointment, her new camera, her issues with her mom, her ADHD, her scheduled main trance ideas for the house, her recovery, etc.  I know I choose to be with her knowing she brought all of this with her into this relationship.  I guess I just didn't realize how all consuming it would be and that very little would get fixed so that it wasn't a constent revolving wheel of the same junk over and over and over again.  It is like a rulet wheel each morning....what will be her issue(s) today.  What will be important to her today?  And I find it disturbing how the only way for me to connect with her is by involving myself in her issues.  Being there to support her and advise her.  Yes, she thankfully has gotten better at seeing how the decisions she makes affect me so that now she includes me more in making the decisions or at the very least informs me of the decisions she made.  And so then I get caught up in what I term "her reality".  But what about my reality.  Why must I live her reality or risk not feeling connected to her.  What about my fears, my holes and dreams.  What about unified hopes, dreams and fears?  When do we ever get to talk, share, connect around those?   So often I feel she just walks her life filling it up with her vision, her view, handling her reality....creating her reality with out leaving space available for creating together.   

    Where is the inter-dependence.  I don't have as many issues as she does.  I learned how to pick and choose my battles and not to create more chaos just to fill up my life and feel alive through drama.  I did this to make room for the beautiful things in life.  But it is like the simplist task becomes so much about her day.  Doctor appointments consume the entire day as she must get there early, connect with her doctor on a deep personal level, almost always a doctor appointment leads to some issue that then HAS to be dealt with right away, so a 1 hour appt. becomes 4 hours.  Then she wasn't home to receive the package she ordered so now must rush off to chase it down......and guess what.....there goes our evening plans.....there goes me getting all my things done so that my schedule was free'd up to head into that part of town we both love so much....to look into her new tattoo, to eat at our cute little restaurant and pick up my son from his gig.....to pick him up together!  She hasn't seen him in 2 months!!  No....I go get him a lone AGAIN....no cute part of town, no dinner together, no evening out together.  On the surface. A non-ADHD couple would say...hey, shit happens.  But this happens ALL THE TIME!!!  It is so much about her reality....her bouncing from thing to thing that is her life...while I ....what?  Happily am the flexible one who says "it's okay honey, we can go another time"....the one who just doesn't count on anything and sees the parts of her life being less important even to the point where I see my children, friends and family never counting on anything i say because they too have learned over the past 4 years that she is not accountable and that I then will be 50/50 as to my desire and ability to be accountable.  How many times am I going to have to make excuses for her???  How many times am I to see that look in someone's eye that says, "Heidi, she let you down again....is this really how you want to be treated??"   Are all those parts of Her life more important then you and you are okay with that??  

    We are suppose to be planning our wedding!  We have rings, and a date of August 31st.  Nothing has been done because it isn't worth even talking to her about it because she is so busy with all the stuff she allows into her life that by the end of the day I wouldn't have her interest or attention anyways.  Fully aware that she loves me and wants me as her life partner I knew I would be the one to see through and make most all the arrangements.  I also new it would be difficult because she does want to have a say in how it goes and the feel of it, etc. but although she tells people "we are getting marred on August 31st, she does not seem to see that nothing (other then reserving the venue) has been planned, ordered. Decided....and it is July 23rd!!  I have made some notes arranged for my daughter to say the blessing, arranged for my sons band to play the music, arranged how to incorporate her 7 year old, and mused with her over seating and ceremony logistics.  She has said she wants us to write our own vows.....yet...really hasn't even said much more about that...other then...."your vows are going to be so much better then mine....mine will be short and not make sense"......wow!  So looking forward to hearing those on what is suppose to be a day of covenant between us!!!  But..it ain't gonna happen anyways!!  She was to pick out our announcements.....this was two months ago!,  and still no announcements.......oh.....but issues with her ex has received full on attention, her son's broken arm fix added on and of uber importance, her meds, her issues with her mom, the 60% off sale at the local store, her friends daughter's interest in robots....every day is wait for her to stop bringing in more and more shit....and focus or pay attention or make important something about US!  Our upcoming wedding for example!,  but it ain't gonna happen.........I will be going this week to cancel the venue (so we can get our deposit back) I have already informed my son not to have his band reserve that date, and have yet to tell my daughter not to begin writing the blessing.  Both my children are with drawing from any sort of connection to her or any sort of excitement over anything with her.  They look at me as if to say "mom!  This is really what you want?  This is really why you left dad and uprooted our family?   They are beginning to stop relying on me and counting on me.....this is sad!  So many excuses for her made!!  No wedding!  She wants us to wear our rings....but it feels void of any rooted commitment when we wear our rings, that she agreed she liked but I ordered and dealt with the ring sizes...she had no hand in it.....and there has been no rooted vows made over them.  Just, hey our rings are here....let's wear them!!  The significance is lost on her!!  

    Where am I in all of this?  Where are my dreams, fears, and hopes?  Where is my vision and what I see?  Doesn't she even care to know?

     

     

  • Why do I live with this?? by: Anonymous (not verified) 10 years 3 months ago

    H finally went back to work on Monday after nearly 2 weeks of not going in. Doctor put him on light duty for 2 weeks due to his knee. H said this was his plan all along because he can't stand his manager and one of his coworkers in the area he works so he is working in a different area. Said he needed these 2 weeks off to get his head together and now while he's in this area he is going to talk to other managers and get his resume updated for other job positions in the company. Of course! Who doesn't take 2 weeks off without pay to get their head together?! I tell him I can't stand one of my coworkers who sits right next to me because she never shuts up and how I would like to take 2 weeks off to "get my head together" too but that's not an option for me! I go in to work like EVERY OTHER ADULT who has a job and get through it! Of course his situation is WAY different than mine and he has every right to do what he did and certainly tries to justify it to me! He said he'll back and see the doctor after 2 weeks and have him extend his light duty. Well he went in on time on Monday and then yesterday he tells me how happy he is working where he is now and said he got to work on time and then just sat in the car for a 1/2 hour playing on his phone and then sauntered on in to work about 45 minutes late. I said "Why would you do that" and his response is "Why not? I used sick time". WHY??? Why do you use sick time for such STUPID stuff as just being too lazy to go in? You finally like where you are so go in on time! He says that everything is so chill there that he doesn't think they really care. He did the same thing today where he didn't leave until 30 minutes after he should have and got in another 45 minutes late. Yeah you are putting on a real good show for the manager in this area that you want to get ingrained with! 2nd day on the job and you are showing up late. He thinks he is so invincible! He thinks he can charm anyone into doing what he wants. Has all these big plans for what he's going to do. Meanwhile I'm stuck paying all the bills because he can't contribute. Just went online and checked his paycheck he'll be getting tomorrow. For two weeks he's got a vacation day, a holiday and 2 actual work days. After child support and loan payments and food service is taken out his check ($452 total) it comes to $389! He had more taken out than what he came home with! He SHOULD be coming home with $1000 more than that! That can't pay for anything. He can take care of his student loan payments and credit card payment and then he's broke again! No help to pay all our other bills or mortgage payment or groceries or gas. I pay an extra $1200 a month for his share of stuff.

    He just seems to find the whole thing comical. And the more angry I get about what he's doing the more comical he finds it!

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